No. Fucking. Way.

[Crazy Elf]

Dog suit.

[Ancient History]

Wedding vending machine.

[3278]

Rotating metal penis.

[Salvation122]

Japanese people are weird.

[Bonefish]

Indeed. but how often do you get rotating and possibly hydraulic robot penis action?

[3278]

That's not a question I'm prepared to give a response to at this juncture.

[Ancient History]

I can only answer that with: http://www.wtfjapanseriously.com/

[WillyGilligan]

Dog suit.

I'm sorry, I thought we'd had this talk already. Like a week after you linked the Australian ad for the show, I heard about the American version. Haven't watched it yet, but I laugh every time there's another article, and not cause the show's funny.

[Crazy Elf]

Yes, but how in fuck's name could it be doing well? I'll tell you how, God hates me, that's how.

[WillyGilligan]

Again, haven't seen it, but it's probably doing well because television is such a creative wasteland that "different" has replaced "good". Having Elijah Wood in it doesn't hurt.

[Crazy Elf]

Fucking hobbits!

[WillyGilligan]

Hobbits fucking dog suits!

[SumDumQuim]

I do not even want to know.....

[Crazy Elf]

This is just a cut and past from here that explains my position on the issue:

There's a TV show called <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wilfred_%2 ... red</i></a> here in Australia. It's about a guy in a dog suit, that's actually a dog, that only one person can understand. I have heard many times that this is quite amusing, and I've no doubt that it may be. It's based on a little known entry to Tropfest back in 2002 that did pretty well and was very amusing. I remember seeing it back then and thinking, "That did pretty well and was very amusing," so there you have it.

Later that year I was working on a show with La Mama Theatre in Melbourne called <i>Trifecta</i> in which I was hired to do interpretive dance. I felt dirty, but I got paid. The show was made up of three separate shows and the one I was involved with was scarily artistic, and probably one of the cornerstones of my rabid hate of arty wank wank (technical term) in the Melbourne "entertainment" scene. The other shows were pretty good, and the most amusing one was performed by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adam_Zwar">Adam Zwar</a>. You may notice him from the show <i>Wilfred</i>.

Adam is a nice guy and sympathised with the misfortune of having to perform interpretive dance. We chatted for awhile, and eventually I realised that he had been involved in that <i>Wilfred</i> thing I'd seen at Tropfest not so long ago. He seemed pretty happy about that, and told me that the guy that played the dog would be along to see one of the shows.

The guy rocked up a few days later. His name was <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jason_Gann">Jason Gann</a>, and probably still is. From the get go we got along pretty well, and ended up hanging out a bit. As a result of this he met a girl I was seeing at the time, called, for lack of a more accurate term Why The Fuck Did I Date This Stupid Bitch (WTFDIDTSB)?

Blah blah blah he fucked her.

Perhaps it's not his fault. I didn't say, "Back the fuck off, dogg!" because I can spell, but at the same time I didn't expect him to be totally blind to basic social interactions. Also, I'm pretty happy with the eventual outcome because WTFDIDTSB was, and probably still is, the last two letters of her namesake. I totally dodged a major bullet.

All the same, whenever I see him on the television I think, "Oh yeah, I'm supposed to kill him," but really lack the drive to actually do so. I think what's most annoying about all this is that we actually got along, he and I, and as a result of fucking WTFDIDTSB it's very difficult to be on cordial terms. Not because of anything getting in the way of that on my end of the interactions, no. It's just that if he ever saw me down the street he'd be convinced that I want to destroy him, and seeing that I look like I head down to Crown Casino and rip cars in half to eat the small Asian children that their gambling parents have left inside for protein he's unlikely to say, "Hey man! How are you?"

And that's sad.

So here I would publicly like to say to Jason Gann that I am happy to be your friend. I won't eat you for protein like WTFDIDTSB probably did with you. That image doesn't even anger me, although it does disgust me and I'd like to stop thinking about it now. I'm going to go watch <a href="http://www.santasm.net/">this</a> now to clear my mind of the horror.