Office Romances: Where do you weigh in?

Serious Paul · Post by **Serious Paul** » Tue May 08, 2007 4:38 am

So have you had an office romance? What do you feel about people who have office relationships?

sinsual · Post by **sinsual** » Tue May 08, 2007 5:05 am

Have I had one? Sort of. We both knew that to pursue our feelings/intentions one of us would have to quit work, and neither of us was ready/willing to do that so it didn't happen.

My personal take is that you don't shit where you eat. In others, hey, that is their problem. I will not look badly at them as long as they can maintain a professional level while at work together. If they can't, then yes its a problem.

UncleJoseph · Post by **UncleJoseph** » Tue May 08, 2007 5:47 am

Since I'm getting married to my "office romance" in about 4 months, there really isn't much else I can say...

Jestyr · Post by **Jestyr** » Tue May 08, 2007 7:59 am

Depends where you work, but I can't see a problem with it. It's not like working with your S.O. is verboten.

In special circumstances - armed forces and the like - it's probably a bad idea, but in general I have nothing against it.

Jeff Hauze · Post by **Jeff Hauze** » Tue May 08, 2007 8:02 am

Definitely opposed, without question. It's funny, because I've got no problems with other folks having such relationships. But I still think it's the wrong decision. There's a separation that you need to have between personal and professional. That line shouldn't be crossed. The ironic part is that four of my friends are in relationships (with other two from that group of four) that developed at work and while working together. But personally, no fucking way.

Liniah · Post by **Liniah** » Tue May 08, 2007 8:32 am

If you're fucking at work don't get caught. That's my advice.

MissTeja · Post by **MissTeja** » Tue May 08, 2007 12:05 pm

Never had one like that. My ex and I met while working together awhile back, but we both got laid off and started new jobs, shortly after meeting. We were together nearly a year.

I don't think it becomes a problem until the split goes down - particularly if its nasty. If so, I think it's your responsibility as a coworker to shut your trap and keep your personal life to yourself.

Liniah · Post by **Liniah** » Tue May 08, 2007 12:13 pm

If you've got a little somethin-somethin going on with your boss, it is best to keep it from your co-workers.

Ampere · Post by **Ampere** » Tue May 08, 2007 12:34 pm

I dated one of my subordinates and it was fine for a while. We kept things separated well. Personal was personal, and work was work. I had to counsel her one time, THAT was uncomfortable. Eventually we broke up, which made it all fall apart. Then things got crossed-over. I ended up firing her.

On the flipside, I've worked with my wife now what...3 times? Most recently was as a claims adjuster, we both had the same job title, at the same company, made the same pay, and worked in the same team. No problems.

I can't say that working with your SO is a bad thing, just that it can be complicated. You have to keep work at work and home at home. It does make your commute nice, and getting to go to lunch with her daily is nice too.

No hanky-panky in the copy-room though. Big-time NO NO.

Daki · Post by **Daki** » Tue May 08, 2007 2:47 pm

If both sides understand and can seperate work from personal life, then there is no problem. Sadly, I've seen that most people cannot and if the relationship goes south it leads to all kinds of problems at work.

Serious Paul · Post by **Serious Paul** » Tue May 08, 2007 2:51 pm

I'm generally against office relationship, for two simple reasons: Most people have enough problems separating their off duty/out of work hobbies/interests/etc from their time at work (How much time we lose at my job to hunting discussions or people watching NASCAR) and two when things go south, which the majority of office relationships I have seen do go south, everyone around you has to deal with your fall out.

In my experience most people tend to measure their lives by the yard stick they got in high school. To them it matters who was the prom queen, and who played ball in school. So their point of reference is so totally different than my own.

Instant Cash · Post by **Instant Cash** » Tue May 08, 2007 3:57 pm

Jaded and I got together through work and an "office romance"

Liniah · Post by **Liniah** » Tue May 08, 2007 9:05 pm

I guess it really depends on what type of job it is too, and how the work-place dynamic is.

zemookie · Post by **zemookie** » Wed May 09, 2007 1:09 am

No. Can't see doing an office relationship. I say this even when I was single. Wouldn't want to blur the two together.

For those who did....more power to ya. Just would never do it myself.

TLM · Post by **TLM** » Wed May 09, 2007 1:14 am

No. The tension levels are just not worth it. I specifically declined a job I was offered because my significant other worked in the same business.

Sure, some people might pull it off, but it's not something I would consider, except in very specific circumstances (like a family business).

Angel · Post by **Angel** » Wed May 09, 2007 4:59 pm

The longest and by far most enjoyable relationship I have had started as an office romance.

It worked for us because neither one of us let our private lives enter into our work, while we were working together we heard a few bads things said of each other, not in regards to our dating (no one ever knew). We just wouldn't let anything cross that barrier, from person to professional, or the other way.

I remember arguing with her at work about work and once we got together after work there wasn't mention of it. So... it helps if you try really really really hard to separate your two worlds.

Cash · Post by **Cash** » Wed May 09, 2007 6:02 pm

Never had an office romance, but I have set friends up (unwittingly) with coworkers. Wow, that can be just as fun when their relationship heads south.

Would I have an office romance? that depends on our dept/level. If we're at the same level or if she's in a different department, then bring on the Cash Love. If one of is a supervisor to the other, then hell no. Even if the relationship works out and goes the distance, it can start way too many problems (with the SO, with coworkers, with the higher up bosses, etc).