Bulldrek v3.0

...about the fact that I believe we are on the verge of a Zombie Apocalypse. What? You were thinking I'd say I am gay. I'll never admit to that...even if it is true.

Seriously. We are on the verge of a global pandemic that will render the infected into mindless walking horrors with only the need to feed. Fortunately, I can wait until they decompose. I have the technology. I have the food. I have the ammo.

DO YOU?











P.S. I don't get how gay men exist. The female form is a work of art. I get that some women like women. But how could a dude find another dude attractive? I'm not judging...I just don't get it.

Whatever, queer.

I don't know whether anything like a zombie apocalypse is going to happen or not, but it does feel like we're sitting on some kind of powder keg lately, doesn't it? World financial system on the brink, people trying to rip you off all the time, other people saying you need to die because their god is way more awesome than yours... Seems like the place could do with a bit less humanity to fuck things up.

I feel, however, that I am woefully under-prepared for the zombie apocalypse.

Uncle Joe is totally gay.

I'm completely unprepared and on top of that I live in the middle of a city. Chances are high that I will be among the walking dead, since though I do have an appartment with good locks and such that is not situated on the groundfloor and I also posess a katana I do seriously lack a store of food, since I rely on the supermarket being open 7 days a week.

I need to get my act together pronto...

I'm totally set for zombies. Buried within the soil is a pentagram that surrounds the whole house.

SWEET. Can I sit up on your roof and blast zombies? Because I'm pretty sure that zombies don't give a shit about pentagrams but it'll probably look just like a god damn Iron Maiden video if it happens to start to glow while I'm all BLASTING THE SHIT OUT OF THE UNDEAD!

It's supposed to be Rapture this Saturday, apparently.

Forecast: 65F and Mostly Cloudy, 29% chance of precipitation. Megaton Shotblast of the Lord followed by a "Holy Shit Complete Assload of the Undead." Nightly forecast unavailable.

See, you can't believe that shit from movies. Some of it is deliberate misinformation. Zombies don't really need a head, that idea didn't exist until the 60s. Their entire essence acts as a life sensor and moves them towards it. You need to aim for the center of mass with a caliber capable of causing them to lose structural integrity.

It's times like these when having a .50 cal rifle doesn't sound like such a bad idea, right? Right?

Wait, wait. We'll improvise a minefield on the perimeter of the pentagram. They'll hit the mines and blow up and we'll shoot them in mid air. Zombie Skeet. This is going to be awesome! Bonus points if they end up in a tree.

I love it when a plan comes together!

UncleJoseph wrote: P.S. I don't get how gay men exist. The female form is a work of art. I get that some women like women. But how could a dude find another dude attractive? I'm not judging...I just don't get it.

I think the chief appeal of faggotry is due to the acceptance. Both of you are men, so you both know, it all boils down to SEX.

I actually am pretty prepared. I even have a plan.

An excellent Public Service Announcement on:

What to do in a Zombie Attack