Irc Funnies

JetPlane · Post by **JetPlane** » Wed May 01, 2002 1:24 am

Why post the "irc funnies" into separate threads, when you can post them all to one, compact, delightful thread?

Come, post here. Unite the irc funnies into one batch of downhome goodness.

Cash · Post by **Cash** » Wed May 01, 2002 1:08 pm

Because it annoys people?

The Traveler · Post by **The Traveler** » Wed May 01, 2002 1:11 pm

Annoying people does seem to be a cherished Bulldrek tradition.

Cash · Post by **Cash** » Wed May 01, 2002 1:13 pm

It's a time honored tradition.

Daki · Post by **Daki** » Wed May 01, 2002 1:36 pm

What about people who are annoying by their mere pressence?

Cash · Post by **Cash** » Wed May 01, 2002 1:39 pm

We elect them President.

voz · Post by **voz** » Wed May 01, 2002 2:14 pm

Than in that case who is not president?

JetPlane · Post by **JetPlane** » Wed May 01, 2002 3:05 pm

I'd have to say Elf.

He may piss off a hell of a lot of people, but he's never annoying.

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Thu May 02, 2002 1:00 am

That, and his innate Ewok Wrangling skills.

Moonwolf · Post by **Moonwolf** » Thu May 02, 2002 2:33 am

Ewoks rule

Daki · Post by **Daki** » Thu May 02, 2002 2:26 pm

Jawas VS Ewoks? Who wins?

Sorrow · Post by **Sorrow** » Thu May 02, 2002 3:25 pm

I'd have to go with the Ewoks.

In A New Hope, we see evidence that stormtroopers killed the Jawas on Tatooine.

In Return of the Jedi, the Ewoks whoop ass on the Imperials.

Crazy Elf · Post by **Crazy Elf** » Thu May 02, 2002 3:49 pm

Wicket can kill the Emperor, people. Ewoks are the most powerful thing in all existence, we know this to be true.

Hell, they survived their plannet becoming unlivable. They can do anything.

Sorrow · Post by **Sorrow** » Thu May 02, 2002 3:52 pm

I'd like to see a Jawa fly a speeder-bike through a forest while being chased by Imperial scout troopers.

voz · Post by **voz** » Thu May 02, 2002 5:33 pm

Hell, they survived their plannet becoming unlivable. They can do anything.

What made their planet unlivable?

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Thu May 02, 2002 5:56 pm

Death Star 'sploding. n00b.

DigiPrincess · Post by **DigiPrincess** » Fri May 03, 2002 5:23 am

I've met many'a'guys that looked like ewoks. Just more hairy.

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Fri May 03, 2002 12:27 pm

Meant, huh? The addition of "an" can make a senteance quiten sunreal.

Cash · Post by **Cash** » Fri May 03, 2002 12:48 pm

So can speeling.

FlameBlade · Post by **FlameBlade** » Fri May 03, 2002 1:32 pm

Sorrow wrote: I'd like to see a Jawa fly a speeder-bike through a forest while being chased by Imperial scout troopers.

Sorrow? It's in Return of Jedi.

Cash · Post by **Cash** » Fri May 03, 2002 1:41 pm

Flame:: Show me where a Jawa pilots an Imperial speeder bike in RotJ...

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Fri May 03, 2002 1:49 pm

Flame got Jawas and Ewoks confuddled again methinks...

Moonwolf · Post by **Moonwolf** » Fri May 03, 2002 2:00 pm

Ewok: Small, annoying, furry, steals tech.
Jawa: Small, annoying, permanently in a robe, steals tech.

They are the same race! Ewoks moved away to Tatooine and became Jawas. Why do you think that they obsess about R2D2, just like Ewoks. They just hide in robes because furry people in a desert looks stupid.

Moonwolf · Post by **Moonwolf** » Fri May 03, 2002 2:00 pm

Ewok: Small, annoying, furry, steals tech.
Jawa: Small, annoying, permanently in a robe, steals tech.

They are the same race! Ewoks moved away to Tatooine and became Jawas. Why do you think that they obsess about R2D2, just like Ewoks. They just hide in robes because furry people in a desert looks stupid.

Daki · Post by **Daki** » Fri May 03, 2002 2:02 pm

And some of those Jawas managed to continue on until present day... *Glances at Cash*

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Fri May 03, 2002 4:35 pm

is waiting for Cash to emit the traemark "Kee! Kee! Kee!"

Harley667 · Post by **Harley667** » Fri May 03, 2002 7:49 pm

I remember Obi Wan saying something about 'This is too accurate for Sandpeople. It must have been stormtroopers.' At the site of the attack on the Jawas. Did he ever *see* a stormtrooper shoot his damn rifle before this point? Broad side of a barn anyone?

Daki · Post by **Daki** » Fri May 03, 2002 7:56 pm

Or reversely, what does that say about Sandpeople's ability to shoot?

Harley667 · Post by **Harley667** » Fri May 03, 2002 8:09 pm

They weren't doing too badly against Pod Racers, last I saw.

Daki · Post by **Daki** » Fri May 03, 2002 8:12 pm

OW OW OW! Continuity problems make my brain hurt.

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Sat May 04, 2002 12:07 am

<Veed> of Chalky? cool...
<Ryan> No!
<Ka0s> no.
<Ka0s> of: w00t!
<Veed> I am
<Ryan> Chalky's chalk "C" will get washed off!
<Ka0s> on my shoulder blade, on the left side.
<Ryan> How will we distinguish him from all the other crime fighting buckets then?
<Ryan> =D
<Veed> I say we kick him
<Moonwolf> Who?
<Moonwolf> Oh, the bucket, duh!

Moonwolf · Post by **Moonwolf** » Sat May 04, 2002 12:12 am

<Ryan> How will we distinguish him from all the other crime fighting buckets then?
<Ryan> =D
<Veed> I say we kick him
<Moonwolf> Who?
<Moonwolf> Oh, the bucket, duh!
<Ka0s> ryan: by denting him ferociously.
<Ryan> LOL Moonwold.
* Ka0s gets a size 78 "K" out and moves towards the bucket.
<Ryan> *wolf, rather.
<Ka0s> moonmold.
<Ryan> That's getting put in the IRC thread, mister.
<Moonwolf> lol
*** Moonwolf is now known as moonmold
<Ryan> posted =D
*** moonmold is now known as moonwold
* Ka0s sprays the fungi with "Mold Away" and kills it.
<moonwold> Ha, too slow
* Ryan is thankful for the diversion from Chalky.
* moonwold hits Ryan with Chalky
<Ryan> Rats.
*** moonwold is now known as Moonwolf

You missed the end off!

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Sat May 04, 2002 12:26 am

Just drink your mead

Ka0s 0verdrive · Post by **Ka0s 0verdrive** » Sat May 04, 2002 12:37 am

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Sat May 04, 2002 12:41 am

SINGLESMILIEPOSTSMITE!™

KERBLAMMO!

My SMITE!™-Fu grows stronger.

Moonwolf · Post by **Moonwolf** » Sat May 04, 2002 1:03 am

What's wrong with mead? Mead is the drink of the gods! I refute your implied allegations that it is bad!

Moonwolf · Post by **Moonwolf** » Sat May 04, 2002 1:10 am

A new one

:

<Instant_Cash> I would make them put me in a hotel with an internet connection
<Pistons> heheh. i was at the residence inn. 'penthouse'. it was decent. but dammit, i like /my/ computer.
<Instant_Cash> When Jaded went to florida, she had a room with a t-1
<Instant_Cash> I was jealous
<Abbey> I know...i read your posts to the list from it.
<Ryan> I B Canuck, IC B GHEY
<Instant_Cash> Yes I be
<Instant_Cash>
<Pistons> hehehe
<Ryan> Pistons' Spell-Fu is mighty
<Pistons> that's right.
<Pistons> and i don't need no stinkin' dictionary no-how.
<Ryan> None of the hi-fallutin book learnin'?
<Ka0s> know-how.
<Pistons> books?
<Pistons> books?
<Instant_Cash> webster was a punk
<Instant_Cash>
<Pistons> we wuz lucky to have smoke signals when i was a kid.
<Pistons> and we /liked/ it like that.
<Moonwolf> Pistons: Things made of a substance called "Paper"
<Ryan> We had to write with jagged shards of glass, we did.
<Ryan> No fancy "pens".
<Ryan>
<Ka0s> in our arms too.
<Pistons> paper. new-fangled silliness, that is.
<Ka0s> your try Erasin' that stuff.
<Instant_Cash> you are literate?
<Instant_Cash> damn fancy stuff
<Ryan> No, arms hadn't been invented yet.
<Ryan> We had to use the bottoms of our feet- it hurt more.
<Ryan> And then walked 100 miles uphill both ways to school.
<Pistons> you had feet? LUCKY
<Ka0s> but then again, the pain wuld put it in your brain that 3 times 3 was 9... that's fer DAMn sure.
<Pistons> i had nothing but ass.
* Instant_Cash is reminded of the monty python "four yorkshiremen" skit
<Pistons> i buttwalked to school.
<Ryan> Hehehe.
<Instant_Cash> My fav
<Ryan> I'm not gonna GO THERE!
<Wildhuntsman> now there is an image I could do without :-/
<Ka0s> Pistons: you're a woman.. you need nothing BUt ass. *runs like bloody hell*
<Ryan> You had butts? Lucky punk.
<Pistons> you should have it so good!
<Ryan> We had feet directly connected to our ribs.
<Pistons> wow. ribs.
<Pistons> wotta concept!
<Pistons> we just sorta kept our guts in a bag.
<Ryan> Bag?
<Pistons> and that's if we were /lucky/.
<Instant_Cash> roight, and now for somthing completely different
<Ryan> Sheesh!
<Ryan> Fancy frenchman!
* Instant_Cash rides a llama through the channel
*** Mace_Shop has left #Bulldrek
<Pistons> french! don't go insultin' me, boyo!
<Ryan> We had a cow's head stuffed with wet leaves for our guts.
*** Ka0s is now known as Knight_with_rubber
<Pistons> ooh. fancy.
<Ryan> And we were GLAD.
<Pistons> we had rocks and water.
<Ryan> (This is /so/ going to be posted, BTW)
<Pistons> and never asked for nuttin' more.
<Ryan> Rocks?
<Ryan> Lah-dee-dah.
*** Knight_with_rubber is now known as Knight_with_rubber_chicken
<Ryan> We had dust and magma.
* Knight_with_rubber_chicken clobs Ryan
* Knight_with_rubber_chicken smacks Ic and the llama
<Ryan> Rocks only came along dickety-two years later.
<Pistons> well ain't you somethin'!
<Pistons> we had atoms.
<Pistons> that's it.
* Knight_with_rubber_chicken thuds Pistons on the head for being silly.
<Pistons> just atoms.
<Ryan> Pft!
<Ryan> Fancy that- atoms.
<Ryan> We had stray electrons to work with.
* Pistons stuffs the chicken up the nearest person's arse.
<Ryan> Had to mush 'em up to get anything done.
<Pistons> superstrings, baby.
<Moonwolf> In my day, we just had quarks!
* Knight_with_rubber_chicken goes on a rampage of thudding and whopmping people with his chicken.
<Pistons> can't do that if the chicken is up someone's bum.
<Pistons> unless you're whomping someone with another person's bum.
<Ryan> Then again, we had to wrangle Ewoks to survive.
<Moonwolf> You had to mix the flavours just right, and that's hard when they're all left
<Pistons> ewoks. you mean the step-stools?
<Ryan> <amerind> Life was hard, and there was much work to be done. </amerind>
* Knight_with_rubber_chicken sighs.

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Sat May 04, 2002 1:10 am

* Wildhuntsman transfers Moon and Ryan to Dilbert's world, and offices
* Ryan gets a brownie and ice cream to complement the wine. whee!
<Moonwolf> Damn you to hell!
* Ryan pulls out a MAC-10 and goes postal on Wildhuntsman.
* Ryan slaps Wildhuntsman around a bit with Chalky, the Crime-Fighting Bucket
<Ryan> Chalky supercedes time and space, bitch.
<Moonwolf> No, no, no, use this
<Moonwolf> *Hands Ryan a man portable Autocannon*
* Wildhuntsman assigns both to the HR department
<Ryan> Oooh.
<Wildhuntsman> as interns
<Ryan> They have /coffee/.
* Flak cracks Ryan on the back of the head with a brick an Fed-Ex's him to Outer Mongolia.
* Ryan throws coffee in Flak's face.
<Ryan> Take that!
<Ryan> Don't /make/ me use the non-dairy creamer!
<Ryan> I'm crazy!
<Ryan> I'll do it!

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Thu May 09, 2002 10:39 pm

<Flak> Adam: You'll screw anyone. ;p
* Ryan is reminded of the scalping scene from Nurse Betty.
<Adam> Flak: That's so not true.
<Flak> Okay, you have /some/ basic standards. Happy?
<Adam> Right. It's gotta have at least one leg.
<Ryan> And a pulse?
<Ryan> I /hope/ a pulse?
<Adam> That depends how recently the pulse subsided!
<Ryan> So, pre-rigor mortis, then
<Flak> What about if it involves having to use a shovel?
<Adam> If it's still warm..
<Flak> Microwave?
<Adam> ROFL!!!
<Adam> YOU, Flak, are ONE SICK MOTHER FUCKER.
<Adam> BTW, say hi to your Mum. I haven't seen her for a few weeks.
<Ryan> lol
* Ryan is tempted to post this whole convo...
<Flak> I know. She's been on holiday for a bit. She says the appointment next Tuesday is still okay.
<Adam> Wait until after Wildfire fucks us all with the strapon. It will be a better conversation piece then.
<Ryan> That could take a while, though
* Wildfire shakes head and goes back to checking ebay...
<Adam> aww! you tease!

Crazy Elf · Post by **Crazy Elf** » Mon May 20, 2002 1:56 pm

[00:12] <CrazyElf> I don't get war, period. It was cooler when they had swords
[00:13] <Jackal> True, make the people actually face their enemies instead of sniping them from 5 miles away.
[00:13] <CrazyElf> Exactally, how many major conflicts would we have then?
[00:13] <CrazyElf> No very fucking many
[00:13] <CrazyElf> No = not, remember that
[00:16] <@[3278]> Well, we'd do that, but then what would allow developed nations to overwhelm the third-world?
[00:16] <CrazyElf> Nothing, ain't it great?
[00:17] <@[3278]> No, because I live in a developed country, and would rather not be taken over by MEXICO!
[00:18] <CrazyElf> Suck the pain! Learn fencing you fuck!

Ka0s 0verdrive · Post by **Ka0s 0verdrive** » Mon May 20, 2002 2:20 pm

ahahaah!

the thought of Mexico overhelming anything is funny.

plus it wouldn't happen up here in canada, what with our foam-padded forks and butter knives..

Harley667 · Post by **Harley667** » Tue May 21, 2002 8:29 pm

<Harley_Cleaning_the_pit> 'Popularity, acceptance, a jedi craves not these things'
<Daki> Harley:: Funny was watching people "dance" to the song.
<Harley_Cleaning_the_pit> cya Slud
<Daki> Cya Slud
<Harley_Cleaning_the_pit> Heheh
<Flak> Funny? It's boring, repetitive with hardly a, if any, shre of originality.
<Daki> Harley:: You're not a Jedi.
*** Signoff: Sludig (Quit: CGI:IRC 0.4.3 [EOF])
<Flak> edit: shred
<Daki> If you were a Jedi, I couldn't do this...
* Daki picks Harley up and bounces him off the walls
* OverLord catches Harley, tosses Daki a baseball bat, and lobs the hamster at him.
<OverLord> Incoming, Dak!
* Daki swings and misses
<Daki> Damnit. Never was good at baseball
* OverLord uses tekinesis to hold Harley directly in front of Daki.
<Harley_Cleaning_the_pit> waaaaaaaa
* Flak sets up the chipper in the outfield with the input slot towards Daki as the batting target.
<OverLord> Try until you hit him!
* Daki swings and misses
* Daki swings and misses
* Daki swings and misses
<Daki> Fuck this...
* WildfireWork snags Harley
* Daki throws the bat at OL
<Daki> It's broken.
<OverLord> OW!
<WildfireWork> Danmit, I leave for a few minutes and look what happens...
* OverLord jams the bat into Daki's left eye.
* WildfireWork puts Harley down saftly out of the combat zone
<Harley_Cleaning_the_pit> Thankyou Wildfire
* Daki yanks the bat out of his eye socket and growls
<Daki> Let's go dragon...
* Daki morphs into...
*** Daki is now known as DAKIHULK
* Flak meanwhile picks the hamster up and drops into one of the automatic pitching practice throwers whilst everyone is distracted.
* OverLord pats his revolver. "Really, now..."
*** Spiral (trilluser@cloaked.sasknet.sk.ca) has joined channel #bulldrek
<Spiral> I am sooooo choked.
<Spiral> My morrowind savegames are fucked
<Spiral> *sigh*
* Spiral waves byebye to his L29 thief.
*** Signoff: Spiral (Quit: Trillian ((Link: http://www.ceruleanstudios.com)http://www.ceruleanstudios.com))
<Flak> Well that was brief abd depressive. SOP then.
* OverLord shoots Daki in the kneecaps.
*** Harley_Cleaning_the_pit is now known as Harley667
<Harley667> whoah
<Harley667> I'm actually out of cd storage by 10 cds
<Flak> Oh I say, dirty pool. Well done that dragon.
* DAKIHULK stands unmoving as the bullet falls from the toughened flesh
<OverLord> Hmm.
<DAKIHULK> Honestly... bullets?
* OverLord reloads with stangely glowing rounds.
<OverLord> Remember Roadspike, Daki?
* DAKIHULK delivers a Coup D Groin to OL while he's busy reloading and talking
<OverLord> Oof...
* Harley667 throws pizza in a random direction to distract the DAKIHULK
* OverLord collapses, snapping the chambers shut as he falls.
* DAKIHULK starts jumping up and down on OL's fallen form
* Harley667 shrugs and hides somewhere
* DAKIHULK needs no food nor pizza while engaged in beatings
<Harley667> Ah
<Harley667> Point taken
<OverLord> OOF OW ARGH YEOWCH
<Jackal> Yes, Daki tends to be quite occupide while he's beating.
* OverLord throws a jar of fire ants into Daki's face
* OverLord gets up and moves some distance away.
<Harley667> Or even occupied.
<DAKIHULK> *munch*munch* Mmm.. tasty but tasties are biting back!
* DAKIHULK starts slapping his face while jumping on OL
* WildfireWork goes oldschool and grabs a plot hole to a Stupid Improbable Comic Book Crossover, slipping it underneath DAKIHULK when he's jumping
<Harley667> Hahahah
* OverLord wonders if Daki remeber what Spike Bullets are...
* DAKIHULK pauses in mid-air, looks down... looks back up and falls through the hole
* Harley667 watches the Wildstorm characters take no prisoners
<DAKIHULK> YYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
<DAKIHULK> hhhhhhhhhhh...........................
* DAKIHULK falls through all the channels and comes crashing back through the top of the channel and smooshes OL
<Harley667> *sings* Die, die, die my darling..... *sings*
<OverLord> OOF!
<OverLord> Gerrof, ya lug!
<DAKIHULK> Not my fault. WF did it.
* OverLord kicks Daki off him and gets to his feet.
<OverLord> Remember Spike Bullets, Daki?
* DAKIHULK crashes to the ground
<DAKIHULK> OL... think about this for a minute...
<DAKIHULK> Shoot me with those, and I'll get angry
<DAKIHULK> When I get angry, I get stronger.
<OverLord> Shoot you with those, and you'll be angry, and in orboit.
<Flak> Query: Spike Bullets?
<OverLord> Essence of Roadspike ina bulle.
<OverLord> Makes very big boom.
<DAKIHULK> So will I when I come crashin back on you from orbit.
<Harley667> You don't want one up you
<Flak> Ah. Why not just go sub-micro nukes?
<OverLord> okay, somehting completely different...
* OverLord zaps Daki with the Mime Ray.
* DAKIHULK breaks his own neck
*** Signoff: Front_Loader (Quit: )
* OverLord summons a horde of happyfunclowns to go hug Daki.
* Flak shoots DAKIHULK with the Boy/Girl turning him into a mutated DAKIHULKETTE.
*** DAKIHULK is now known as DAKIHULKETTE
<Harley667> Oh lord
* DAKIHULKETTE kills the clowns with ease and eyes OL
<OverLord> When force fails, use frivolity.
<DAKIHULKETTE> My my... what a big... dragon you are...
<OverLord> And speaking of which...
*** The-Mighty-Buddha (dirc@cloaked.cnorth01.va.comcast.net) has joined channel #bulldrek
<Harley667> lo Buddha
<OverLord> EEP!
* OverLord runs!
* Harley667 scampers for the fridge
<Jackal> I don't know, Daki now has the power of hormones....
<Flak> Hola Buddha.
<The-Mighty-Buddha> yo
<OverLord> Hell with this...
* DAKIHULKETTE throws a tarp over himself and fashions it into a dress
<DAKIHULKETTE> Oh Oooooooooverlord....
* OverLord gets airborne and flies to safety.
* DAKIHULKETTE jumps VERY high and lands on OL's back
<DAKIHULKETTE> HI!
<OverLord> AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! GETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFF!!!!
* DAKIHULKETTE hugs OL tight
<DAKIHULKETTE> Oh you big softie... playing hard to get....
<Jackal> Shit OverLord...the....*bang* *bang* *bang* ...anti-air defenses....
<OverLord> *GLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!*
*** OverLord has left #Bulldrek
<Jackal> lol
<Jackal> You broke him
*** DAKIHULKETTE is now known as Daki
<Harley667> Holy crap
<Jackal> hehe
<Nexusvoid> lmao
<Nexusvoid> roofl
<Nexusvoid> hahaha
<Harley667> Note this one on the calender, people
<Harley667> Love slew the dracoform
<Harley667>
<Jackal> He is now dubbed overload
*** OverLord (OverLord@cloaked.strato.net) has joined channel #Bulldrek
<Harley667> Hahah
<Daki> Quick, someone throw this in the IRC thread.
<OverLord> Phew...
* Harley667 has it logged, if you want
<Jackal> I'm not even sure where to start
<WildfireWork> Probably have to go back to DAKIHULK
* Jackal ponders
<Jackal>
<Daki> Hey OL... there was some big green THING looking for you.
<Harley667> Is it in sst or BD?
<Daki> BD
<Jackal> BD bitch, know your role.
<OverLord> Well, keep big green away form me...
<Flak> OL: <Jackal> He is now dubbed overload
<Jackal> hehe
<Jackal> overloaded
<Jackal> too much Daki will do that to you

JohnnyRico · Post by **JohnnyRico** » Wed May 22, 2002 2:02 am

Ka0s 0verdrive wrote:ahahaah!

the thought of Mexico overhelming anything is funny.

Yeah, come take a look at "Little Mexico" on Long Island, and tell me that Mexicans can't overwhelm places... damn border-jumping illegal alien bastards...

Jackal · Post by **Jackal** » Wed May 22, 2002 2:08 am

<[3278]> Crap. I think I fixed it.

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Wed May 22, 2002 6:21 pm

I really should look at getting back to spending more time on IRC.

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Thu May 23, 2002 1:47 pm

*** eva|mtg is now known as Eva
<[3278]> da w00t!
<Ryan> Heyas Eva.
<Eva> Hey Ryan!
<Eva> I was just giving you shit yesterday about not attending the gatheirng.
<DomesticJackal> Ryan: No, working my domestic skills and doing housework.
<Eva> Because it's all your fault, you know that, right?
<Eva> I mean, the responsibility rests solely on your shoulders.
<Ryan> ...
<Eva> You punk.
<Ryan> I...
<Ryan> Love you?
<Eva> Hahah!
<Ryan> =D
<Eva> I should call on the JustiGoat to punish you for your slacktitude.
<Ryan> Oh, not that!
<Eva> Oh, yes, that.
<Ryan> Anything but that!
<Eva> Everything and that.
* DomesticJackal cues bad porno music
<Eva> Porno?
*** Justigoat has joined #bulldrek
<Eva> We're in a porno now?
<Justigoat> Hey, sweet thing.
<Eva> Justigoat!
<Eva> I call on you to punish Ryan!
<Ryan> ...
* Ryan runs and hides.
<Eva> Punish him for his slacking ways!
<Justigoat> Not so fast, little man.
<Eva> He is a fair scapegoat!
* Justigoat grabs Ryan by the back of his shirt.
<Eva> Awww yeah! :oD
<Eva> The mad punishing action.
* Eva sits back with a Cosmo and enjoys the show.
<Justigoat> Is what this just and wise lady says, true?
<Ryan> Er...
<Ryan> Uh...
<Eva> You bet it is, Justigoat! You know it is!
<Justigoat> No, I'd be delighted to hear your thoughts on this.
<Ryan> I think-
<Eva> As your humble servant I would not dare lie to you!
<Eva> You know I wouldn't!
<Justigoat> IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK!
<Ryan> AAAGH!
* Eva giggles.
<Eva> Teh punish!
<Eva> Teh punish!
* Justigoat takes Ryan into a nightmarish surreal subRealm of Balance and commits unspeakable horrors upon him. When Ryan returns, he is covered with a shiny, opaque goo of some kind.
<Ryan> What... a wonderful... tea party.
* Ryan collapses.
<Eva> Dayamn!
* JavaKai winces
<Eva> That's more than a pearl necklace.
<Justigoat> Well.
* Justigoat zips.
<SludWork> The Justigoat is channeling the Rock.
* Eva ^5s the Justigoat.
<Justigoat> My work here is done.
<Eva> Thanks man.
* Justigoat returns the ^5 with aplomb.
<Eva> Care for a drink or something?
<Justigoat> Hmm...
<Justigoat> Scotch would be nice.
<Eva> Rocks?
<Ryan> Kind of early, isn't it?
<Justigoat> No, straight up.
<Justigoat> Quiet, you. I've been up for 3 days.
* Eva hands the Justigoat a Scotch straight up in a gorgeous square glass.
<JavaKai> Sorry Ryan, just the web hacker Kai here today, Wildfire's off doing something probably rather destructive
<Eva> I want to make a shirt that declares my love for Wildfire, but I'm afraid her fiance will beat me up.
* Justigoat sinks back the drink, and admires the glass for a moment in the light reflecting off of Ryan's gooey body.
<Eva> Cheers, my man. You deserved it.
<Justigoat> Cheers.
<Justigoat> Well, I must be going. Gary Condit deserves my attention.
<Justigoat> AWAY!
*** Justigoat has quit IRC (Quit: The Justigoat abides.)
<Eva> Good people.
<Eva> Always a fun time.
<Ryan> I think that deserves posting.
<Eva> So, Ryan.. how ya feelin'?
<Ryan> I'm...
<Ryan> Looser now.
<Ryan> Somehow.

Damn two-timing Justigoat...

The Justigoat · Post by **The Justigoat** » Thu May 23, 2002 1:48 pm

SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE NEEDS A SECOND HELPING...

Ryan Murphy · Post by **Ryan Murphy** » Thu May 23, 2002 1:50 pm

I'll be good.

DarkMage · Post by **DarkMage** » Thu May 23, 2002 2:57 pm

Did any of you guys see those really bad "sequals" to Star Wars where this family ends up crashing on the plant where the ewocks live, and they and the ewocks have to fight this evil queen?
How dumb was that.

Daki · Post by **Daki** » Thu May 23, 2002 3:21 pm

Ugh. Return to Endor. So bad they made two of them.