Do Not Get Married...
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- No-Life Loser
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Do Not Get Married...
Or, if you do, be sure to increase the physical security on your place or Thorn and I will break in and do all of these things to you!
We would have completed this list of all the horrible things that we had planned to do to the happy couple. Good thing they thwarted us with a brunch...
Clear JellO in the toilet, complete with a fishtank diver
Jingle Bells attached to the bedframe.
Sugar in the salt shaker and vice versa
Sew pants closed.
Reverse batteries in remotes.
Max out the volume on the alarm clocks, set them for odd times and then hide them
Unscrew, but do not remove, all light bulbs.
Max out all volumes on all entertainment appliances.
Smear vaseline on all handles.
Change outgoing message on answering machine.
Fill some room with crumpled newspaper.
Fill some drawer with packing peanuts.
Put CD's into different cases.
Change internet access password to "something funny".
Have Christian email SPAM delivered.
Peel Labels from canned goods, in fact, bring odd canned goods to strip.
Box of superballs at the head of the stairs, rigged to cascade as the door opens.
Suction cup dildo in shower.
Reprogram Tivo for mexican wrestling/soaps, fishing shows and Full House.
Fill shoes with rice.
We would have completed this list of all the horrible things that we had planned to do to the happy couple. Good thing they thwarted us with a brunch...
Clear JellO in the toilet, complete with a fishtank diver
Jingle Bells attached to the bedframe.
Sugar in the salt shaker and vice versa
Sew pants closed.
Reverse batteries in remotes.
Max out the volume on the alarm clocks, set them for odd times and then hide them
Unscrew, but do not remove, all light bulbs.
Max out all volumes on all entertainment appliances.
Smear vaseline on all handles.
Change outgoing message on answering machine.
Fill some room with crumpled newspaper.
Fill some drawer with packing peanuts.
Put CD's into different cases.
Change internet access password to "something funny".
Have Christian email SPAM delivered.
Peel Labels from canned goods, in fact, bring odd canned goods to strip.
Box of superballs at the head of the stairs, rigged to cascade as the door opens.
Suction cup dildo in shower.
Reprogram Tivo for mexican wrestling/soaps, fishing shows and Full House.
Fill shoes with rice.
<a href="http://heftywrenches.wordpress.com">Agent Zero Speaks!</a>
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- Lord Death Hand
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- Location: Flatsville, Iowa
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- No-Life Loser
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- Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2002 7:28 am
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- No-Life Loser
- Posts: 11964
- Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2002 7:28 am
- Contact:
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- No-Life Loser
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- Bondsman of the Crimson Assfro
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Aah.. dead birds roasting on an open fire... chestnuts nowhere to be found. No bloody relatives (cause they're all dead). Can't wait.
Oh yeah. School too because my bloody Uni's administration can't read a bleeding calendar, and they scheduled Thanksgiving Day break a week early, and were too pig-headed to change it after they printed the schedules.
Bloody morons.
Oh yeah. School too because my bloody Uni's administration can't read a bleeding calendar, and they scheduled Thanksgiving Day break a week early, and were too pig-headed to change it after they printed the schedules.
Bloody morons.
Ahem...BRING IT, CYBERMONKEYBOY!
I got married.
It'll be 6 months as of the 18th.
Points finger at the sky, and the weather started to get "rough"
It'll be 6 months as of the 18th.
Points finger at the sky, and the weather started to get "rough"
____________
[glow]SMITE!tm[/glow]
[glow]SMITE!tm[/glow]
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- No-Life Loser
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Re: Ahem...BRING IT, CYBERMONKEYBOY!
Dirty Dirty Man!Chuckles wrote:I got married.
It'll be 6 months as of the 18th.
Points finger at the sky, and the weather started to get "rough"
We shall find you, and then the shivaree will commence!
<a href="http://heftywrenches.wordpress.com">Agent Zero Speaks!</a>
- Lord Death Hand
- No-Life Loser
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- Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2002 7:42 pm
- Location: Flatsville, Iowa
7ft tall!? you don't want a woman, you want a man in drag!!Nightsky wrote:*Opens door to see a 7 foot tall blond chick in a bikini holding a box of chocolates and a chainsaw*
You are the woman of my dreams, marry me!
<center><b><font size=1><font color="#FF9900">"Invaders blood marches through my veins, like giant radioactive rubber pants! The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!" -Zim</font></font></b></center>
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